Monday, 26 March 2018

Chapter One: Welcome to Oasis go have babies!

So this is my 100 Baby Challenge! Yes I'm doing a male sim gets pregnant by the female population challenge and I don't care! I have a twisted mind, I do things and then think later! Anyway as I explained in my Introduction, this is my Jared Leto sim, and I made this boy a few years ago in the Sims 3...

...I even made his tattoos but I was never satisfied with him...I am still working on him! The first one was made in 2012 when I was not familiar with CC eyes or facial hair. The second was my favourite because ombre hair! And the third was my last tweaking, I also did a Joker version but it freaked me out so I left him in my library to cackle away to himself! But as I said, I'm still not content!(it's the nose...and the chin...oh I could go on!)

When Sims 4 came out I made him again and was even less happy with how he came out so I won't show you his original version, and like his Sims 3 counterpart, I am still not completely satisfied with him and still tweak him from time to time! I am a perfectionist, and when I have a bee in my bonnet I don't stop until I have done my absolute best! I never share him, he is my own little project...until now! He's going to give me 100 babies, and he doesn't know it yet...well he's a sim so he trusts me mwahahahaha! 😜

So I've moved my Jared sim into Oasis Springs with a wee Chihuahua called Kaya. I started with an empty lot, which he stared at like "How the holy heck am I supposed to live here???", but I decided to be kind to him and built him a modest home!


JARED: It will do.

Wow, so enthusiastic! He possibly knows what I have planned for him! 😈

Anyway as I said, he is not alone! He has wee Kaya to keep him company!

JARED: Aww ain't you a cutie! Yes you are! Daddy loves his little girl, mm-hmmm!

Touching, now moving on...

JARED: Can I open a dog sanctuary?


JARED: Why am I here? Who even are you anyway? Why is my dog shivering at the mere mention of your...what is your name anyway?

Gee nosey much? It's irrelevant, go settle into your new home, I made it just for you!

JARED: Pfft, you'd better have WiFi and a decent guitar in there or I am leaving! Isn't that right KiKi?


JARED: Shush she's called KiKi!

I see a swimming pool with no ladders in your future!

JARED: What?


So he and "KiKi" settled in nicely, then the neighbours came round to welcome them to Oasis Springs. I see some potential baby mamas there! Katrina Caliente and her daughters Nina and Dina! Oh and Don Lothario came along too, ugh he's a pain!

NINA: Well this is...disappointing! I was told he was famous, he's from Hollywood or something!
DINA: Are you sure? It's pretty small!
KATRINA: Trust me he is rich, this is just a front!

Er, no he has very little money! Hee hee! 😂

 Jared gets to know his neighbours, Katrina seems more interested in her ear buds but Dina is rather captivated by his riveting conversation. Her sister Nina is getting a lecture from ol' Lothario for daring to say Jared is a looker.

DON: Come on Nina, he is NOT better looking than me! You need glasses!
NINA: He talks way too much, but he's cute!

The Caliente sisters are arguing over who gets to date my little man! No dating, just baby making!


 NINA: Dina just be reasonable, being the first born I was given the divine right to have first dibs!

 While the Caliente sisters argue over little Jared, Don Lothario is giving him the evil eye!

JARED: Why does he glare like that?

He's weird!

JARED: So am I but I'm not glaring at him like I wanna cut his throat!
DON: Just a little word of advice, you keep away from my girls, kapish?
JARED: *gulp* Sure!

 JARED: *grin* Yeah I'm not gonna do that! I do what I like!

Your funeral!

Don then announces they are leaving, but Dina decides to stay and get to know Jared a little better. Don isn't happy as Jared gives him a smug grin!

And he's rather cocky about it too! I see him making severe enemies with Mr Lothario in the future!

 JARED: And so I named this one friends beyond boundaries because cats and dogs can live in harmony...

 JARED: Where did she go?

You bored her away! I had plans, baby number one was to be conceived tonight!

 DINA: Well I have to go now but, you know, call me?
JARED: Call you what?
DINA: On the phone?
JARED: Yeah call you what on the phone?


 Why do you have to be so difficult???

JARED: To annoy you!

Well done, it worked!


 JARED: Hi! I'm Jared, I just moved here, I have no friends, do you wanna be my friend?


 Lilith Vatore had the misfortune of passing by his house, and now he is being...irritating!

JARED: Do you live around here?
LILITH: No I live in Forgotten Hollow!

JARED: Where is that exactly?
LILITH: Not here!

Oooh the sass is strong with this one, I like it!

Jared welcomes Lilith into his home, he INVITED her in! We all know why that was a bad idea, the little guy will find out soon! 😣

After engaging in some conversation, Jared discovers something that we already knew...

JARED: Are you a vampire???

I'm not sure if he's happy or not about this little revelation!

LILITH: Ummmmm...yeah!
JARED: Okay that's cool, I just thought I would, you know, ask!

After a brief chat and befriending Kaya, Lilith has to go. They exchange numbers and they seem to be on good terms, but I'm still no further forward on the baby front! 😔

JARED: Holy sh*t she's a vampire!

Yes, she is!

JARED: That's...amazing!!!

JARED: So I sell this and I get to buy a guitar?

Maybe later, you need money for other things right now like...cribs and potties and high chairs!

JARED: Pfft, no I don't! Why would I need any of those things?

There's no going back, I'm doing this! He'll just have to go along with it! But how to break it to him? Hmmm...

Kaya eats like a horse, I mean really, where the heck does it all go? She's so tiny! I swear her bowl is always empty!

I'm finding his enthusiasm for painting to be very useful! He's also very quick in advancing his painting skill! He makes good money, although he does pine for some musical instrument...he doesn't mind what really, he has needs!

While he is creating his latest masterpiece, a text comes in from Don Lothario...well that is not threatening AT ALL! 😓😓 What he really means is, keep away from my girls or I'll gut you like a fish!

Kaya stops moaning and sleeps on the couch despite having a perfectly good dog bed to lie on. Jared is no help there, he lets her do whatever she wants! 

And at the moment he really doesn't care what she does (which right now is standing in the hall wailing), he's off on a date...

So she asked him out, but she doesn't seem all that happy about it. Come to think of it, neither does he! Am I ever going to get any babies out of him??? 😬

I know why she was looking a bit pissed off, she was on fire! Vampires! Anyway now Jared has come over all bashful, I think he said something inappropriate! NEVER! As if he would do that! 😆

In other circumstances I would frown upon you following a female into the bathroom, but I'm on the clock here so do what you have to do! Although I imagine this red haired woman is going to be your gooseberry!

 He's actually getting somewhere with Lilith, and the redhead was about to leave until this dude crashed the party! I think a retreat is the best plan of action my boy!

 Once they finally get out of the bathroom, Jared showers Lilith with compliments and flirts mercilessly. That's my boy, gimme dem babies!

JARED: You are very pretty when you laugh like that!
LILITH: Oh, *snort* I've been told it's annoying *snort*.
JARED: Not at all!

 JARED: Here's a present!
LILITH: Ooooh!

Smooth, let's do this now I'm impatient! Shame there isn't a stray bush or a cupboard for woo hoo!

 And a kiss! Good good, just invite her back to your house and seal this deal! You can do it! Do it for me!

JARED: Will you SHUT.UP!

Sorry! 😳

 LILITH: You are really cute, you know a gal could see herself spending an eternity with someone like you!
JARED: Eternity you say...what does that involve?

Never mind, get me babies!!!

 LILITH: Maybe we can discuss it again, over dinner or...a DRINK?
JARED: Yeah, sure! I'm partial to both of these things for I get hungry and thirsty often!


 Well that was a bit of a let down! He leaves empty bellied and I am perturbed!

JARED: I have to go, I'm up early remember? You made me get a job!

Oh yes, I SUGGESTED he get a job in the painter career since he is doing so well with his art. I didn't MAKE him, well I did but...

 And we're home, no babies!

JARED: What is with all this talk of babies?

I want you to have babies!

JARED: I see, well nope to that!

You don't have a choice kiddo!

JARED: I'm calling the police!

What? How? Why? Where?

JARED: Kidding, I'm texting Lilith goodnight!

On his first day of work, there is an incident! And little Jared returns home "dazed", he seems to have been involved with toxic fumes! Wonderful!

 He did get a promotion though, now at level 2 so...every cloud!

JARED: KiKi! Come play fetch with daddy! All five of you!

 Little painting fiend! Still no action! I grow impatient but he gets tired all the time, and when he's not tired he's painting!

 WAIT! He's getting his phone out! What are you doing???

JARED: I'm going to invite Lilith over, I felt the urge!

HA! That was me BTW, in case you didn't know! 😜

 JARED: Helloooooo Lilith, vampire queen of my dreams! Say do you fancy coming over? You do? Well mosey on over this minute!

Mosey? Vampire queen of your dreams??? Anything that gets the job done I guess!

 Well he wastes no time and they agree to try for a baby! YES!!!

 JARED: This is my room, this is my bed, and you may hoppeth in!

Yes do! Put a bun in that oven!

 A few minutes later...

JARED: Why am I taking the pregnancy test? That doesn't make any sense! Shouldn't she...

QUIET! I see confetti!

 JARED: What does...what does that...mean?

Congrats, you're preggers!

JARED: I see!

 JARED: So...I'm sleeping next to Lilith right now and this is all one big bad dream...yes?
Nope, you're pregnant and you will pop out baby number one in a couple of days! YAY!

JARED: You're sick, you do know that right?

Yes, but who are YOU to judge?

JARED: Noted, I do feel really sick!

 LILITH: Are you okay? You look a bit green!
JARED: It's morning sickness! Oh my word did I just say that???

 JARED: So, I suppose I should tell you that I'm pregnant, that sounds so wrong, and you're
LILITH: Really???

 LILITH: Well I didn't want to say but you were looking a do I say this...chubby?
JARED: Excuse me???

 JARED: How very dare you! I am growing our child, that is so insensitive! Just typical of a woman to...what the holy heck is HAPPENING TO ME???


 JARED: OMG I could eat you! You're sooooo cute! *sniffle* I love you so much!

Yep hormones!

 So Lilith is still here!

JARED: I know she won't go away!

Get rid, now!

JARED: I can't!

Why not?

 JARED: I feel fat, and ugly, and just...meh! I don't wanna see her, I'm shy!


 LILITH: So what are we calling it if it's a boy?
JARED: Um, well I can think of that later. 

Tell her to go, tell her the baby is ours...*ahem*...I mean yours!

JARED: Well the thing have to go now!

 JARED: So I did it, I got rid of her! Do you think she's mad?

Good boy, um...dunno!

JARED: She's mad, I know she's mad!

So what, I got what I wanted!

 I think he's a bit upset, and perhaps I was a bit too cold? He's been painting ever since she left! Maybe I should explain to him what's going on...

 ...except I have a problem!

JARED: I'm not speaking to you!



Well that's a fun welcoming text if ever I saw one!

 What are you doing sweetie?



JARED: I'm baking a cake, I'm hungry!

 JARED: Come on, come on, come on!



 JARED: I'm eating ALLLLLL of this cake and I don't care!

That's fine, you do you honey!

JARED: I don't need your permission!

No that's right, you don't!

 JARED: I like this music, it's...nice!

Are you talking to me again?

 JARED: No I was talking to KiKi! The world does not revolve around you, okay?

Fine! Noted! Understood!

 KAYA: 👀

 JARED: I feel sick!

No bleedin' wonder!

 He has a couple of hours to kill before work, so he paints! Always with the painting!

JARED: Hate you!

I'm not sure who he's talking to as I should assume I am not the only person in the universe!

 Maybe you should take Kaya for a walk? Get some fresh air, could do you some good?

JARED: Yeah okay!

😲 Did you just agree with me?

JARED: Don't make it a big deal, I feel like I've had my body hijacked so I'm kinda in limbo here!

 Off he goes, Kaya is less enthusiastic, and he has an hour until he starts work! I do hope she is a good girl and doesn't make her daddy late!

 YOUNG WOMAN: that a pregnant man???
OLD WOMAN: Don't be ridiculous of course no...

 OLD WOMAN: Well gee I've seen everything now!

 BLONDE WOMAN: Is he pregnant???

 DARK HAIRED WOMAN: Either I'm seeing things or that guy over there is pregnant!

 JOGGING MAN: So is that a woman with a beard or a pregnant man?

 OLD MAN: Note to self, make an appointment with Spec Savers, just thought I saw a pregnant dude!


 JOGGING MAN: Hey dude, I gotta ask, are you...

 JARED: Well that was humiliating!

 Well that walk must have been a long one, Kaya is knackered! While Jared works, she sleeps...on the couch still!

 A few hours later she is awoken by daddy's dulcet tones. The grumpy pregnant guy has returned from work and is promoted to level 3 of the painting career!

 Back to the easel as usual, he is still a little embarrassed by this morning's walk!
JARED: People are very opinionated around here! 


Are you eating all of that?

JARED: Why yes, and I care this much!

How much?

JARED: Zero much!

Lilith has called, and he's ignoring her!

 Why are you ignoring Lilith?

JARED: I am not presentable for visitors!

 What is he doing now???


What are you doing?

JARED: Making a salad!

 You're eating a lot!

JARED: F**k off I'm eating for two!

I'll say!

JARED: Leave me alone, your opinion weighs less than the air that I breathe!


 JARED: Do you think I'm fat?

What? No! You're growing a human, your body is providing insulation for the baby!

 JARED: Am I pretty?


JARED: Do you love me?


  JARED: Ugh my back! When will this end???

Well you're in the second trimester so a wee bit to go! I'm sorry, you make me feel bad now!

JARED: You should feel bad, I've never been so uncomfortable in my life...

JARED: ...or miserable, or unloved, or...


JARED: Thank you, all I needed was a little appreciation!

 Miss Vatore keeps messaging him, and we are ignoring her! He's constantly in a bad mood!

 We're now in the third trimester, and he makes this face A LOT!

JARED: So would you if you could no longer see your p...

That's quite enough of that, and I don't have one!

JARED: Neither do I anymore!

 KAYA: 🙌

She wants to play!

JARED: And I want my body back!

 JARED: I am soooooo tired!

 Aww he looks so peaceful, maybe he'll be in a better mood when he wakes up?




 JARED: Kid is playing with my bladder like a football! This is so unfair! Why am I doing this?

Because...I dunno, sorry I have no excuse!

 And we're baking another cake!

JARED: Don't judge me, you're the one responsible for all of this!

Was just an observation that's all!

JARED: And here's another observation, you're a sick puppy!

That's fair!

 Kaya has an empty bowl and daddy is sleeping! I dare not wake him, he is getting worse! Even Kaya is too scared to ask him to play!

 Feeling better?

JARED: What's it to you? And why are there all these cribs in here?

In case it's twins or triplets!


 Eat, pee and sleep you say?

JARED: Yes, and work while needing to pee, eat and sleep!

I don't know if I can make him go through this again!

JARED: What do you mean...again? First you talk multiples, now you talk of repeats???


 We're doing well, we have some money in the pot that's good!

JARED: Uh-oh!


 JARED: Wait a minute I saw this film...

What film?

JARED: The alien burst out of his chest and he was dead, oh this is...owwwwww!!!

 JARED: KiKi, daddy is dying! Please find Lilith, she will look after you!

You're in labour babe!

JARED: Well it feels like death!


Just breathe...

JARED: Gimme drugs, gimme a hammer to the head! ANYTHING OH GOD WHY DOES IT HURT SO MUCH???

 It's a girl!


What did you think it was going to be?

 JARED: Oh my God she is beautiful please let me keep her!

Of course you can keep her, why wouldn't you?

 JARED: I dunno, I just...hello I'm your daddy!

She needs a name, what are you going to call her?

 So this is Ariel, she is baby number one of this challenge! so that's 1 down, 99 to go! No big deal, we can do this!

Well...HE can!

End of Chapter One!